Four seasons
by lexwrites
Summary: Every season, Rachel gets a new letter.


It's winter, when it first happens; a damn cold day has Rachel wearing jeans with her usual sweater type, this time with a fairly cute unicorn on it. She absolutely, truthfully hates it. Unfortunately, no one else likes her everyday style, so they all consider the pants an improvement; Kurt is the only one who actually voices his amazement.

However, Rachel just shakes it off and hurries to her locker with her gaze carefully set on the floor; not that she would admit that that was her lame attempt to hide the shame she holds for that day's choice of wardrobe.

As she grabs her book for Spanish class, something hanging on the left side catches her attention. Some kind of letter, maybe? The envelope looks rather vintage and anyone in their right mind would probably think that kind of stuff is creepy, especially because it smells like the insides of an antique shop; not that she smelled it, nor did she regularly visit _that _kind of shops.

The warning bell rings just before she opened it. She'll read it next class, when she has a free period. On her way to Mister Schuester's class, she dotingly greets Quinn who just nods politely and then walks off in another direction before promptly remembering that she has Spanish, too.

They walk into the classroom at the same time and both curse themselves for not arriving early to grab a seat. Now they have to sit together and Rachel is, in no way, fond of that arrangement. She doesn't have anything against the girl, per say, but she decided on bringing the letter with her and she doesn't want to suffer through endless teasing about it.

Quinn seems to notice the envelope on the table but says nothing at all. Actually, except for a few times Rachel caught her staring, sometimes at the object and sometimes at her, or gulping softly, she minded her own business. Rachel knows that this day must be bad or something for the blonde, or she would most definitely say something about it.

Quinn's hand is raised for a fair minute or so before the teacher notices and, when he does, he allows her to go use the restroom and Rachel swears she has never seen anyone exit the classroom as quickly as she did. For a split second, Rachel wonders if it may be morning sickness but dismisses the silly thought almost immediately.

The envelope on the table stood unmoved as Rachel was startled by Quinn's re-entrance in the classroom. It took all she could not to look away from Mr. Schuester as she noticed Quinn's distracted glare before she gave in and gulped as she saw Santana staring at her. Maybe turning around wasn't such a good choice, just like the jeans pants.

The bell _finally _rings and Rachel moves to exit promptly; not that she was scared of Santana or anything, she just really_ wanted _to get out of there. Yes, wanted.

When she gets to the auditorium, where she spends her free period, most of the students are in their classes and everything seems quiet enough for her to read the letter.

She opens it carefully, making sure to note to herself that she saves the envelope in her _non-existent_ collection, and reveals an equally old paper with a neat handwriting on it. _Dear Rachel, _is written in bigger font, a dark shade of pink letters makes her smile; it's always been her favorite color.

Rachel proceeds to read it and finds herself wearing a soft smile throughout it. It's made of encouraging words, telling her that she is beautiful, it mentions gorgeous even, and how she shouldn't let anybody else make her believe otherwise. Then, she thinks it's from Finn but she really can't hold on to that since it clearly doesn't sustain any grammar errors so far, and that is enough of a reason to discharge her ex as a prince charming.

The letter is full of unbelievable compliments as she goes on and Puck is, too, disinclined from the potential list. Jesse is the only half-possible option but he is in Los Angeles and could not possibly send a letter directly to her locker. It has to be someone from the school.

_Love, L _is the ending that leaves Rachel quite puzzled because she doesn't know anyone whose name starts with that letter; except for maybe Lauren but she doesn't even roll it around her mind. Maybe it's a nickname, and boy does Rachel hate those; that certainly decreases the attraction of the whole secret admirer concept.

Still, the bell rings and she has to head off to her locker and collect her History books, where she daydreams about the letter-writer and ignores Finn's constant attempts to gain her attention, like she would ever not pay attention in class; well, not pay attention to the letter.

After school, she is alone in her living room, lounging on a comfy sofa wrapped in a blanket, re-reading the letter and wondering about its sender but never quite gets it. _L _could be anyone. Absolutely everyone was in the possible-circle; or, at least every guy.

Tomorrow passes normally, no letter in sight and Rachel must admit she is a bit disappointed but determines it was only a one time thing and forgets everything about it.

* * *

><p>Spring comes much faster than Rachel but she can't complain; she is wearing one of her usual outfit. With it, also, comes a new letter. A little gold star is holding the envelope tightly shut this time. It makes Rachel flash a plain smile from her wide range but she isn't really happy about it. She is definitely <em>not <em>a fan of being kept waiting for something.

It's her last class of the day and she doesn't feel like visiting her locker again, so she puts the envelope in her backpack along with some books she will need this weekend and heads towards the class so she doesn't ruin her perfect attendance.

Kurt obviously notices something's up because the first thing he asks once she sits down next to him is what happened. She chooses to ignore him and instead tries to focus on the teacher but fails at that task when Quinn enters the classroom.

The blonde sits right in front of her and she suddenly becomes interested in watching nothing but the girl's hair. It's nothing that keeps her occupied for long because she snaps out of it once she figures out it would be weird if anyone notices.

She glances over at Kurt and sees that he is kept busy with his phone, so he didn't see her… well, staring. Rachel feels like something has changed inside her but still can't put all the pieces together; it might take her a little longer than she had expected it to really figure it out.

The bell scatters the students out of the classroom but Rachel takes her time. There's no one she has to hurry up for, so she takes her time and slowly walks to her car.

Noah stops her to ask if she is going to temple and, after she answers affirmatively, he says he'll see her then and that maybe they could hang out after the service.

Her mind is occupied with thoughts of him for the ride home. Noah is a decent guy, the best friend she ever had before Kurt. Before, their weekends together consisted of making out or drinking beer in his garage, on some good days she even tried playing those incredulous video games with him. But not anymore. Now, they only talk and relax from a long week at school. Their dialogues are mostly about college these days because, if Puck was to ever start worrying about not making it out of Lima, it's now.

Rachel parks her car in the garage since her fathers won't be coming home until late on Sunday night and she won't be driving anymore for the week.

Coming into her home, she drops her backpack and heads towards her room, putting a kettle of water so she could make her hot cocoa.

Dressing into her yoga pants and an oversized sweatshirt, she proceeds to make the cup of cocoa and collects the letter from her bag before going to the basement and making herself comfortable on a spacious armchair.

Carefully removing the gold star, she pins it on her sweatshirt, near to her heart, conveniently. The familiar smell overtakes her for a moment before she takes the paper out of it. The handwriting is neat, still, and she starts reading it almost immediately after noticing that little detail.

This time, the writer says it's nice seeing her in her usual attire again. Yes, attire, that's the word used. Is it possible someone, except for her, to use the words like that? Is it possible a _guy _is using that words?

She clearly isn't the only one, or it's just pretending to get her to like the letter more. Whichever it is, it's succeeding. Rachel makes a mental note to herself to pay special attention to the vocabulary in the first letter after she goes up to her room.

L says many nice things about her, once again. Rachel thinks no one has ever been that nice to her, romantically, except for a short Finn's phase when he tried to be a gentleman.

Once she finishes the letter off, she thinks about it again. Not a thing indicates L has romantic intentions. The fact that the identity is still unknown isn't much of encouragement, either.

But the same signature as in the first letter cheers her up and convinces her that there is hope that someone is still interested in her. Someone who really cares about her.

After watching a little bit of TV, she departs for her room, where she carefully places the second letter in a drawer where the first one is and tries to focus on her singing for the rest of the night. Or at least that was what she had initially wanted to concentrate on but ended up with reading the letters over and over again and then finally falling asleep sprawled around on her bed.

* * *

><p>March passed and then April and then every other month of school. Rachel was truly expecting another letter to be in her locker on their last day of school but nothing came.<p>

Maybe it was because she is with Finn again, after a full month of him begging her? She had absolutely no idea.

In August, right when summer started being cruel with its high temperatures, Rachel's dad brings in a letter that is, without a doubt, for her. As he passed it to her, she avoided the questioning look and quickly exited the living room, making sure to trip on the coffee table in anticipation of reading the letter.

Ignoring her father calling her for down for lunch, she opens the envelope and takes out the letter, noticing the script right away. Rachel can almost see a hand making those graceful moves this time, she realizes it's different. She is fantasizing too much about this person but cannot actually bring herself not to think about the writer.

Apologizing for the delay, the author explains that her schedule was very busy the past month. Yes, Rachel is now referring to _L_ as a girl, because the hand she keeps picturing is certainly not masculine.

_L _hopes that her summer vacation is going well and that she is still practicing her singing regularly. Rachel's snort at this is obvious; like she would ever stop practicing. And the writer knows her too well, because the continuation is about her laughing at the statement.

Rachel sighs as she reads that _L _is sure Finn gives her compliments all the time, wishing for a moment that was even slightly true. But as she reads more, the smile on her face is inevitable when the compliments start.

They aren't the same as from the first or second letter, somehow. The writer manages to say new things with every line she reads.

The signature is the same but a heart is added in the lower right corner of the paper. It's very specific way of drawing a heart and Rachel is sure she has seen it before. Somewhere…

But she can't figure it out. No matter how hard she tried, she can't even remember where she had seen it.

Her head jumps back in frustration as she relaxes on her bed with the letter still in her hand. Her phone signals a new text message and, as she expected, it's from Finn. He wants to go out later and Rachel can't help but sigh loudly.

She sends back her apologies and how she can't make it, relieved that Finn is surprisingly alright with that. She usually jumps at the opportunity to have any kind of company, especially because Kurt has decided her wants to visit some relatives with his dad and Finn's mom.

The fact that Finn's house is empty is too much for her to handle when Finn insists that they spend a day there. She isn't ready for what her boyfriend wants and makes up as much excuses as she can when he asks her that.

Weekends with Noah were mainly good, except for those when he decides getting drunk is a good idea. Rachel can mostly take his rambling about Lauren and how she is away for the summer but when he gets drunk, they are unbearable.

She tries to help him as much as she can but nothing can stop him from opening his soul to her, completely and shamelessly, when he is under the liquor's influence. She then only dreams about that night ending and nods her head at him from time to time.

Still, she'd much rather have that than be alone with Finn.

* * *

><p>And when autumn comes around, Rachel comes to her senses and leaves Finn. She isn't sad, per say, but she will miss someone that cares about her. Especially now, when there is no sign of another letter.<p>

Grabbing her keys, she exits her vacated house and heads to the driveway.

Normally, she wouldn't have even looked across the street, but the wind blows a single leaf in that direction and she is distracted. Instead of heading towards her car once again, she watches Quinn.

The said girl is leaning against her car, her hair freshly cut, and looking at Rachel lustfully. Her hands are behind her back as she yells, "Let me drive you?"

Rachel, though, isn't so sure about this. Why would she go with Quinn? There is no reason for her to comply; quite contrary, actually. "Why?"

As her voice quivers, she pays attention to a hand escaping the grip between Quinn's back and car. There, she holds the only reason that Rachel will ever need.

With her keys put away in her pocket, Rachel heads towards her. Her questioning look doesn't go unnoticed but Quinn ignores it. Instead, she opens the passenger door, indicating for Rachel to come in, and hands her the letter from her hand.

She wasn't sure that it would work, that Rachel would be willing to come with her, but it did. And she has a smile on her face when she sits behind the wheel. Rachel is looking at the letter but there is no time for her to explain everything. She starts the car and startles Rachel a bit but she is looking at the road now.

The sound of the envelope opening frightens Quinn but she doesn't turn around. She gulps and continues driving through Rachel's neighborhood carefully.

It's not the first time she goes that way, her house is just a few minutes away from Rachel's and it was her regular route to school in their sophomore year and the beginning of junior year.

Rachel has the paper in her hand and is studying the handwriting carefully, not reading the letter. "Stop the car."

Quinn is confused and looks at Rachel to find the answer but cannot decipher the look that the diva has on her face. "What?" She asks instead, looking back at the road.

"Stop the car." Rachel repeats. Her voice isn't giving any sign of emotion and Quinn complies once she finds a suitable place.

With the engine off, she is able to look at the Rachel as the brunette sweeps Quinn's face in her hands.

The sudden kiss took Quinn by surprise; for a moment, she just stood still. But when she came to her senses, it was all she ever hoped would be. Not that she had fantasized about it, or whatever.

Their lips touched, their breaths evened out; Rachel was dazed. If they weren't already, she would have to sit down to endure the action. She wanted more; she _needed_ more. So her tongue asked for permission into Quinn's mouth. Permission granted.

She ventured Quinn like she had never done with Finn, Puck or any other boy. She ventured Quinn like she had felt. She saw fireworks, the time stood around them, nothing could replace the feeling that Quinn gave her at the moment.

They parted, only a bit, and locked their gazes. It was the only thing they wanted to do that day; the only thing that mattered that day.

"School." Rachel breathed out, ruining both of theirs perfect imagination. She was right, though, they needed to get there in time.

And they did, just barely, Quinn holding Rachel's hand all the way there, making sure not to break the contact by no means. She parked her car near the school, in a spot reserved for her from her cheerio days and got out, motioning for Rachel to stay there.

Rachel's first thought was to wait until Quinn was in the school, so no one could see them together. But Quinn came around her car, dashing her fears away, and opened the door for her, like it was an everyday occurrence. And, holding hands, they walked into the school fearlessly, surely gaining everyone's attention.

At that moment, there was absolutely nothing, and no one, that could stop Quinn from walking _her _girl to the class. Nothing, and no one, that could strike fear into her as much as Rachel could help her get through it.


End file.
